it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
i've created a new STD.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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