Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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