I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
