you have to choose: penises or morals?
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
