You just made me feel so damn special
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Randomize
