I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
no you cant smoke seaweed
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
