32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize