It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
