It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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