Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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