Nicole vs. Life
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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