If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
