I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I don't think brook has ever known best
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
