Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize