Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
PANTIES FOUND
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