break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
