After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize