You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
He called his prostate his "boner button".
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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