No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
