I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Randomize
