ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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