This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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