Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
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