no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
