Grow some girl-balls and come out already
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
