This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
