he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
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