I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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