Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
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