stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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