i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Dick very happy bro
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
