I could have mohawked her pubes.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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