I'm eating all of the evidence.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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