I love black thongs
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize