best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
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