That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
