I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
