Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
