and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
