your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
