turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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