there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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