i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
