everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Girls should come with a carfax report
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
