OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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