Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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