i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
