Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
