Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
