I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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